Calculus Limericks

This is what happens when you're given the assignment of being creative with a year's worth of calculus and you mix in sleep deprivation:


There once was a girl from Philly
Who found calculus to be quite silly
She stared at her binder
Hoping for something kinder
Then decided to move to Chile!

****

There once was a girl named Jane
Who struggled a lot with domain
She confused it with range
Which she also found strange
And eventually she went insane!

****

There once was a lonely limit
Who wanted a life with more in it
He approached infinity
And felt some affinity
For the fact that he really existed!

****

There once was a graph named Livadiv
Who wanted to find his derivative
He checked his slope
For he was no dope
And determined where he’d be negative!

****

There once was a function named Raoul
Who teamed up with his sister Jewel
To find their derivative
We need to fight back with
Our good friend the power rule!

****

There once was a boy named Fred
Who had many numbers in his head
He tried to add them up
But found it too tough
So he used a big Sigma instead!

****

There once was a girl named Lauren
Who thought that word problems were boring
“They sure would be great
If we used related rates!”
And thus was the end of her yawning.

****

There once was an indefinite integral
Who wanted the answers to all
“I know what to do!
Just throw in a U!
And now you’re ready to play ball!”

****

There once was a girl named Abby
Who confused continuity and concavity
One dealt with strips
The other with dips
But they both begin with a C.

****

There once was a logarithm named Bob
Who wanted to connect with the frogs
He changed his base to e
Ln(x) now was he
Ta-da! A natural log!

****